December 7th, 2022 – 9:55am – Haifa Hostel, Haifa, Israel:

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I stood on a hilltop above the world and looked down at all that was. Behind me stood my house with all my things, my beloved things, the way I wanted them. My yard was perfectly kept and the trees had been pruned to produce the ripest fruit. Suddenly God stood beside me and we looked down on the earth below together.

“Is this what you want?” He asked me. I knew Him well enough to instantly know what He was asking. He was asking me if this life I had built and longed for for so long was what I wanted and did it satisfy me or did I want to serve Him. I knew that His question was out of His deepest love for me. He was calling me back into the journey with Him.

“No… it isn’t what I want.” I replied, “I want to serve you.” And as I answered I knew it was true. I wanted Him and I wanted to please Him.

Suddenly I stood alone on that hill and turned to look at all I had, all my earthly possessions. Then a wind began to blow… slowly at first and then more and more strongly. The Holy Spirit moved with such power over me and all I owned. Piece by piece those things I treasured so much were blown away by that strong wind until I was all that remained standing on that hill.

“Go.” I heard God whisper. And the wind became a mighty torrent and it lifted me up off my feet and carried me away across the earth to a far away place.

As I moved about this far away place doing what He asked me to do I listened. I listened for the wind. For it’s moving. For the sound of it and the feel of it and the lifting of it. And so… finally I feel the wind beginning to rise again. The wind is getting stronger again.

And I heard Him say again, “Go.”

And the wind is increasing day by day getting stronger and stronger and soon I know it’ll carry me away to another place where He has people waiting for me to meet.

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Some things are so difficult to express in words. The moving of the Holy Spirit is one of those things. Feeling the rhythm of the Spirit as He moves about the earth. Learning to always listen and be moved when the time comes to be moved is very difficult. We are such linear creatures. With our houses and our cars and out desk and beds… how will I ever be use to how quickly He changes directions? How can I explain it to people? How can I say… oh the wind has changed and it is time for me to go. I hear a call that no one else hears and my instructions come from a still small voice only I hear.

Perhaps this is the purpose for this season of Obscurity. The faith and the ability to move when the wind shifts and the call to Go comes. What is, isn’t anymore, because it can’t be because the time of things changes. A season ends and a new one begins. Also, writing about spiritual things feels like writing about water or air or wind or fire. So I just have to do my best… and then I wonder is this blog the place to write about what was and is and is about to come? How to express my journey for others to read and understand? But maybe even the understanding of others is something I must lay at the altar and surrender.

Obscurity is being unknown. And so if I’m carried away by the wind to some new place… all I shall say from now on is that the winds have changed and I follow the One who leads me forward. Left or right, the voice I hear says, “This is the way, walk in it.”

And so I shall follow the wind wherever He leads… because I belong to the wind… the wind doesn’t belong to me.