December 9th, 2022 – 11:06am – Haifa Hostel, Haifa, Israel:

God has provided for one more week of my stay at this hostel. I still have a bill of $450 that I cannot pay as well as my phone bill. Asking God to provide for these things as well as His continued provision for my time remaining in Israel.

This will be somewhat of a natural update, but I am sure the spiritual aspects of it will be evident.

I came to Israel with so many ideas of what my time would be while here and where it would lead me. As usual putting many of my own thoughts onto what God had told me to do. Will I ever simply obey Him without making my own conclusions as to what His desired final outcome is. He told me to come to Israel and study Hebrew… and that I have done. During this past 2 and 1/2 months I have had so many conversations with travelers from around the world, so many friendships made, so much time and love given out. I listened to the Palestinians and I have listen to the Israelis. I have talked to those in immigration and those in government and those who are making Aleya… the return to Israel for Jewish people.

What has been made so abundantly clear to me by the Lord is that Israel will not become my forever home. The thoughts I had toward this drove me to obey in coming and in coming I learned so much about this country and the people living here. But it is truly a battleground country… and the painful part is that it is not my country and not my language. God was gracious and gentle with me as He lead me slowly through these revelations.

I wanted so desperately for my life to be more than simply sitting in a room in the US and writing books as God instructs me to write. I see now I wanted adventure and I wanted it to be here in this land. But what I have learned is that I already am and have been prepared to write the books God wants me to write in English. It is my native tongue… and in English I can most accurately and genuinely express my relationship with God.

If I were to study Hebrew for 40 years I would never still be able to command the language as I can command English. So letting go of my preconceived ideas was very painful. Pride is like that… but God is gracious.

I was created to listen to God and to write what He tells me to write. This is my true and complete calling and for this, as I have finally come to understand, I can do best on the shores of my own country. Time and distance mean nothing in the supernatural. This I’ve always known… but it is a hard things to accept.

A week ago I stopped attending my Hebrew class. I have reached a level with Hebrew of the basics of language structure and common conversation. But once I fully accepted what God was so graciously and gently tell me there was no longer a reason to continue the class.

I believe that all that passion and drive to come to Israel was from the Lord or I wouldn’t have taken the journey and learned and discovered all I have. And I wouldn’t at all change the daily interactions with all the people I have met along the way. God had a plan for my coming to Israel. Some painful lessons… and His gentle way of redeeming everything for the good of those who love Him.

It has been a painful and difficult two and half months. But I have grown in my walk with God and in my understanding of what He has planned for me on this earth with the remaining time I have.

To simply be an author who has a relationship with Him.

After I stepped away from the Hebrew class, Seattle, Washington came to my mind very heavy. And God gave me an assignment there. So I am waiting on Him to provide a plane ticket to Seattle now for me to continue onward in this journey He has for me.

It has been a lesson in humility and a lesson in letting go. God’s ways are not our ways. But He faithfully leads those who seek to do His will.

I am so grateful for the love and support of my family and friends as I clumsily seek to obey God’s leading of my life.

I wrestled so much with feelings of utter defeat during this time here in Israel but have finally given all of this to God and I will continue to trust that He is able to complete the work He has for me to do before He takes me home.

If you would like to give something toward this next part of my journey, my return to the USA, you can give via my GoFundMe:

https://gofund.me/953f0d99

Thank you again for traveling this journey with me to see what God will do next.