There are moments when the loneliness of my journey overwhelms me. When the quiet pain inside is just too much for me and my eyes water as my chest heaves. And then the silent sob rocks me as my eyes water and the tears fall with my next blink. The pain inside is just too much to bear… too much to hold in.

Mostly I’m strong and brave. Mostly I can focus on what God’s asked me to do here in this quiet place. Mostly I can exercise my “great” faith and trust Him for everything.

Mostly…

But the moments no one sees are the ones He sees… and it’s in these moments that He draws close and wraps His arms around me. I cry in His arms for a while. He doesn’t say anything. He knows words wouldn’t take away the pain. I feel His approval, not of the pain of the moment but of the obedience to Him. And it’s in these moments that I die a little bit more to myself. These are the “take up my cross and follow after moments”. I’ve asked Him a thousand times to take this cup from me… but not my will but His be done.

His answer is always a silent “No.”

You see the truth is that He is God. He sees what I cannot see. He knows what I cannot know. He knows right where He wants me to be. He’s seen all these moments before I was ever born. He is my God.

And it’s these moments… these quiet moments… these still moments… these lonely, painful, exhausting moments… in which I know that I am right where I am meant to be and where He wants me to be.

I am alone… but God has never been nearer, closer, or present.

I was chosen for this journey… and when I asked God: “Why me?” His reply was: “Because you.”

You have a journey to take with Him. You have a cross to take up and carry.

Do you know what favor feels like? I do. It surrounds me. Look at my life… take any moment since the day I was born and you’ll see God’s favor all over it. I am so very blessed… and why?… “Because you.”

We live in a world of words: TV, movies, family, friends, governments, advertisements… and the list goes on and on… all that noise…

And it’s true… all I have to offer you is my words… and I’m sure my words are mixed in with all the other noise of your day… but listen and hear me when I say this one thing…

God is real.