December 6th, 2022 – 5:45pm – Haifa Hostel, Haifa, Israel:

I have decided that living a life of faith in this modern world of ours requires living in the moment. And I find that in the moment is in fact the same practice as will be in heaven in eternity. But living and loving in the moment here in our time-obsessed world is very, very difficult.

Tonight, I am sitting at the laundromat in Haifa a few streets away from my hostel doing my laundry. It’s been a very busy few days and I am tired and a bit worn down. Since I entered into Obscurity my life has been filled with divine encounters… in a seemingly endless way. Day after day there are people to love and people to share my faith with and people to encourage in their walk with God. I love every single moment… because the moments are all I have. I do not know what tomorrow will bring. I know that today I have booked a bed in this hostel until Friday. I know that my bank has $30. And I know that I will have clean clothes in 7 minutes. These are things that don’t seem to bother me.

Trusting God has become my way of life and since entering into Obscurity I have clung to Him much more tightly. He is my portion and I really am simply living for Him.

I have been asked if I like to serve God. What a funny question! I know those asking are asking because they wonder what it would be like for them if they truly decided to serve God with everything. And so I don’t fault them the question. The answer to it changes daily for me. Do I enjoy not knowing where my next meal will come from or where I will be sleeping tomorrow? No. I don’t enjoy those uncertainties. But there is a high certainty that overrides the lesser ones… God is God. He is… and so I can be and am.

Everything in this world is in Him and through Him and from Him. I am just blessed to fully experience that truth every single day. And more and more I find myself lost in His love and that overrides all else… every worry and every concern for my own well-being dissolves in my awareness of His unfailing love for me. I am surrounded by His favor and I am held by Him.

A man I was talking to today about my books and my journey said, “Well this journey of yours is your journey and your path, but it may not be for everyone.” I quickly agreed with him. And it struck me… yes my journey is uniquely mine. As is everyone’s journey uniquely theirs. What I offer through my blog and my books and my sharing is a glimpse of what a life lived in relationship and obedience to God really looks like. Day in and day out. The ups and the downs. The struggles, sacrifices, loneliness, triumphs, joy, and day to day grind of being a follower of Jesus on this earth in our modern times.

One thing that always bothered me as I read autobiographies of the generals of the faith is that I didn’t get to see much of their humanity and their wrestling with doubts and fears as if they were some how super human and didn’t have any hidden sins or struggles or loneliness. All of that “humanity” was stripped from their stories… watered down as if somehow that would be a better message of the overwhelming grace of God than the reality they actually lived day by day.

God told me to write the good and the bad and everything in between. To write of my obedience and my disobedience. Of my sins and of how God’s grace is woven into my life to produce fruit for the kingdom through obedience and suffering.

So I write on… day after day… the truth as much as I can. Yes, there is a lot that I do not write about. Yes, there is so much more day by day… God grant me grace to learn more and more what to write about.